typical Sunday

1. Wake around 6 am, squirm around and wonder about things for an hour. Debate breakfast options with anticipation. Debate running with the opposite of anticipation. Assess the weather with an eye to finding it unfavorable for running. Remember the importance of health and fitness. Make faces. Put on newest athletic gear and run/walk for 20 minutes. Do some squats and lunges, push-ups. Give up.

2. Shower. Go through the most elaborate version of the morning skin regimen. Apply more hair oil than usual. Put on cute underwear and cute pajamas. Make coffee and prepare an egg somehow. If it looks nice, take a photo. Stare out the window. Watch YouTube.

3. Do laundry, clean the bathroom, pick up the week’s debris, take out the recycling, organize your tea box. Turn the pants that you don’t like into shorts. Fix a zipper. Make a note of the dubious health of the plants. Use acetone to remove the sticky residue the price tag left on a book. Try on new lipstick. It’s good! Take it off. Re-apply lip balm. Only 10 am? You are so efficient. Grow existential. Think about whole-grain artisan breads. Imagine a better life.

4. Read.

5. Stare out the window.

6. Read.

7. Realize you will eventually need some antique hat pins. Poke around on the internet. Think about French kitchens. Type ‘French kitchen’ into pinterest. Type ‘rustic Spanish kitchen’ into pinterest. Think about money. Think about kitchen financing. Look for a recipe for crème brulée. You don’t have a blowtorch. Drat. You have so much stuff and somehow none of it is a blowtorch. Resolve to get rid of useless stuff. Make a tentative pile of useless stuff. Research culinary blowtorches. Put the one you want on your amazon wishlist. Feel appeased and productive.

8. Put on something casual and some lipstick to test. Get herbs and raw almonds from the grocery store. Assess the social effect, if any, of the lipstick shade. Make a salad with sunflower seeds and lots of parsley. Drink coconut water. Wish you were going to make cookies, but you are not going to make cookies. Cookies are so wonderful. Observe your lifelong reluctance to share. Consider strengths and flaws in your character. Think about feminism. Consider the meaning of success re: you. Grow skeptical of several things at once. Resolve to exfoliate more thoroughly. Take pictures of something or other for the blog.

9. Fold laundry while watching Jurassic Park dubbed in French. Mentally create a rugged safari-style look inspired by Laura Dern. Think about the coolness of Laura Dern. Realize you want to keep one of the things in the pile of useless stuff. Buy fake bangs on eBay.

10. Read something else. Then something else again. Reorganize the stacks of books near/on the bed.

11. Take a nap or a walk, or both.

12. Make a dinner involving several steps and pans and much chopping. Garnish and photograph. Wish you hadn’t spent all of your money on a jacket, so you could have champagne. Clean up. Remember how much you love the jacket. Observe how cheap popcorn is. Popcorn is so cheap! Popcorn is so delicious!

13. Change into pajamas. Face mask #1.

14. Sundry grooming. Face mask #2.

15. Evening ablutions and regimen. Test a perfume sample.

16. Read. Edit various lists. Think what must be done tomorrow.